In a world where remarkableness seems almost ordinary these days, I can’t claim any super specialness. I haven’t held my breath under ice water for 20 minutes or set any world records, I’m not an ex-Navy SEAL and didn’t spend a decade in India studying eastern mysticism under a guru. (I do love these kinds of people, though, and am always amazed at how many people there are in the world who have lived incredible and varied lives.)

Who I am is simple. I experienced emotional pain early in life. That pain caused trauma, but I didn’t know it, because who does at that age? That trauma caused me to seek relief, which I found first in my 20s in heroin. That relief was very short-lived and quickly turned into more pain. 

At age 28, I hit my drug bottom and entered recovery, after having my first mystical experience. I attended 12-step meetings regularly for over a decade and got my life back on track, but the trauma was still alive and well. I did lots of therapy and got to know my issues intimately, until my own stories bored me to tears. I stopped when I learned that the point of therapy had nothing to do with becoming happy. 

I felt empty and numb inside and didn’t know why. I got married, had 3 kids, and started a business, all the while pursuing any conventional or alternative potential modalities that I hoped would address my emotional pain.

As my business grew and experienced a measure of success, so did my burden of responsibility, and I became even more stressed out and miserable. I started meditating like my life depended on it. At first - nothing. And then, slowly, subtle shifts began to happen. I started to follow my intuition around the next steps - in both my business and my personal life.

Where before I had never revealed my personal story in the context of my brand-based business, a call to do so grew louder within, despite the fear and discomfort around whether it was the right thing to do.

As it turns out, sharing my story became the catalyst for fusing pain into purpose and became a powerful connection point with our business community. Instead of being a brand marketing to customers, the conversation shifted to humans talking to humans, in a very real way.  What became apparent is how much pain we all carry, and that people are just dying to take off their masks when given the opportunity. 

As my meditation and healing journey continued, I was drawn to the renaissance movement currently underway with plant medicines, and eventually partook in numerous plant ceremonies as well as therapy-assisted psychedelic journeys. Through these experiences, I understood and experienced the essence of myself, and of who we all really are. And through this, the deep wounds within finally started to heal.

And I started to become present to wonder in my life and experience the deep, embodied fulfillment that is within us.

Who am I? I am not a body or a thing but a vibration of energy. Like you, I am a magnificent, powerful being, a spark of the Divine that resides within, waiting to be called forth and brought to service.